Ape vs. Monster

Unrated

4/29/20211h 30m

Digital Release (US)

~ The Greatest of All Time! ~

Overview:

An ape crash-lands on Earth, which creates a sludge that makes him and a passing lizard grow to giant-size, resulting in a fight for dominance.

Director:

Daniel Lusko

Status:

Released

Language:

English

Buget:

$0.00

Revenue:

$0.00

Key words:

monster
giant monster
ape
mockbuster

Cast

Eric Roberts

~ as ~

Ethan Marcos

Arianna Scott

~ as ~

Linda Murphy

Katie Sereika

~ as ~

Eva Kuleshov

Shayne Hartigan

~ as ~

Lab Tech Jones / Blair

Narek Kirakossian

~ as ~

Secretary Pudovkin

Iria Pickard

~ as ~

Chem. Eisenstein

Rudy Bentz

~ as ~

Noah Murphy

Gregg Marcantel

~ as ~

General Reynolds

R.J. Wagner

~ as ~

General Delaney

Malcolm Green

~ as ~

Marine Myers

View full cast & crew

Reviews (1)

t
tmdb28039023
Written 2 year(s) ago
1
Ape vs. Monster is not set in a alternate timeline; it’s in total denial. Somehow, George W. Bush and Vladimir Putin team up to launch a "deep space probe" manned (monkeyed?) by Abraham the Chimpanzee. In 1985. Ten years before W. was even governor of Texas, while Putin was a mid-level KGB agent stationed in Dresden.

Chimpanzees have a relatively long lifespan, but like any other animal, they need food to survive — not a lot of bananas in outer space. Thus, Abe was presumably dead of either old age or more likely starvation even by the time they "lost contact" with the probe on "August 12th, 2007."

Miraculously, though, when the capsule crashes back down to Earth in what I assume is the present day, not only is Abe alive, but he has turned into a large, indeterminate primate of the computatrum generatae genus; picture the lovechild of Bigfoot and Bubbles.

Yada yada yada Abe and a similarly enhanced Gila monster have a battle as epic as two amorphous CGI blobs can be said to have, and the triumphant Abe (say what you will of Ape vs. Monster, but at least it has the decency of declaring a clear winner, unlike Godzilla vs. Kong) is relocated to a "sanctuary" in Santa Fe — because what better natural habitat for a chimpanzee than the f---ing desert?